Baby Vaccinations from Baby's Point of View

Baby's first shots from parents point of view:


Poor little guys is gonna have to get his first shots today. I hope he's not up ALL FRICKIN' NIGHT. Like I need that again. Should he even be getting shots? I heard shots are to babies as Brutus is to Caesar. How can I live with myself if these shots betray my baby? Now I'm nervous. Should I cancel his appointment? That's silly. It will be fine, but man I hope he's not up all night. I feel for him and all, blindsiding him with needle sticks, but he's not gonna remember it, right? Right? I don't know. Should I cancel his appointment? No. We're doing this. Shots are good and protect him. Unless they don't. Okay, let's do it.


At the appointment:
Okay, let's hold him until we absolutely have to put him down. Oooh he's smiling! Make faces to elicit more baby smiles! He has no idea what's coming. He's gonna hate us. Shots aren't Brutus, we are Brutus. Oh, here's the nurse. Let's put him down gently. Hold his hands! Keep making faces! LOOK, MORE SMILES! This is going well, we've gotten through the oral vaccination. He seems to have liked it. What a smiley booger-wooger beans. Hold his hands, the shots are coming now. Keep his mind off it! Desperate silly faces to elicit smiles! It's not working! IMMEDIATE SCREAM AND FROWNS! Oh no, he hates us. He doesn't know we are protecting him from meningitis and whatnot, he just knows it hurt real bad and we are responsible. I feel like such bad parents. Hold him and snuggle. Oh, no more tears! Is he asleep already? 


Baby's first shots from baby's point of view:


Ooh look, we're going somewhere! I love car rides. I like swinging in my swing more. I hate this! When are we going to get out of this car? Why did you take me out of my swing? I want to swi----(snores).


At the appointment:
Oh, I must have fallen asleep, how embarrassing. Ooh, mom is holding me. I love to be held. Being held is my favorite! Ooh look at the lights! Have you ever seen lights? Lights are my favorite! Hey, how come I have to take off my pants? It's cold in here. Oh well, mom is still holding me so I guess it's cool. Hey, don't put me down! Who's that lady? Where are mom and dad? Oh, there they are. I'm okay. I thought they abandoned me here with this new lady I've never seen! Mom and dad are being silly, I'll give them a smile or two. They're trying so hard. Mmmm the strange lady just gave me something kinda tasty. It doesn't taste like milk. I wish it was milk. Yeah, give me some more of that, it's delicious. I wonder if this lady could talk to mom about making my milk taste like that. Hey, mom and dad are holding my hands! I love mom and da-- what the...THAT BITCH JUST STABBED ME! How could you guys let this happen? No, I don't want to be hel---(snores).


___
Mylo did great at his 2 month check up yesterday. He's a healthy weight and length and took his vaccinations like a champ! He was pretty sleepy all afternoon and night, but this morning he seems to be fine and just wants to be held, swing, and play. 'Atta boy!

Mylo-ween

Halloween is our favorite holiday and now it's EVEN BETTER because we have a little one to exploit dress up! I didn't get to dress up myself this year - I'm using the new mom exemption - but we did dress up Mylo. Like Yoda of course.

And we couldn't have Yoda without carving our pumpkin like the Death Star, could we?

There are instructions on how to carve this one and lots of others at this site. Next year I think I'll try the Nightmare Before Christmas scene.


Here's Bryan and Mylo getting ready to hand out candy to trick or treaters. We thought it would be too obvious that we wanted the candy if we took Mylo trick or treating.

Note: That is not coffee in our coffee mugs. Parents have to have a little fun on Halloween too, am I right? Also, we didn't give away our cell phones to trick or treaters. But that would way better than candy.


Bryan had a wear-your-costume-to-school day as part of Red Ribbon Week, so he recycled a costume we did a couple of years ago. No one got it then and no one got it now. 

Come on, didn't anyone watch Nickelodeon in the 90s? Legends of the Hidden Temple? BLUE BARRACUDAS?! Ugh. You people.


This pic is from a couple of years ago when we originally did the costume, complete with pendants and all. You know, so that when the scary man in the maze pops out at you when you're trying to assemble the monkey statue to beat the time clock to win a vacation to space camp you can give it to him and continue on your journey. 

Obviously this was taken before we went to the party when our spirits were high because we thought we had such a genius original costume idea. We were wrong. We didn't even get a picture together. 


I've always wanted to go to space camp.

Recent Discoveries

Sometimes I discover things that I just feel like everyone should know about. This is a short list of these things. Not that I'm pulling a "Columbus" and claiming to have discovered any of this first per se, I just feel like I need to spread the word. Also, there is some potty language in this post. 

And now for a video that is amazingly apropos to my current situation (there's cussing in it. The F-bomb mostly):

1 - "Go the Fuck to Sleep" by Adam Mansbach. This version is particularly fantastic because it's narrated by Samuel L. Jackson, who is a purveyor of awesomely quotable quotes. "I've had it with these mother fucking snakes on this mother fucking plane!" comes to mind, as well as Bryan and my favorite, "I don't remember asking you a GOD DAMN THING" from Pulp Fiction. Okay, that one may be a tad bit obscure, but it's in there and it's super funny, especially when applied to an awkward encounter with a nosy host at a family theme park, but that's a story for another time.


2 - The Bloggess. Apparently I'm pretty late to this party, but this is a blog from a woman in Houston and her life. She rants. She raves. She cusses. A lot. She's pretty hilarious, and if you only read one post I think it should be this one.


3 - Tzatziki. It's a Greek style cucumber and yogurt dip with dill and sometimes garlic if you're feeling edgy. You eat it with pita chips because it's classy. It's super healthy too, so you can eat the whole bowl and not feel as bad about it as you would if it were something like 7-layer dip. Win!

The Magic Blanket

It's been a month! We've had a super fun time being parents, except of course for the lack of sleep. In our case, the sleepless nights were due to our squirmy little toot wiggling out of his snuggly swaddled blanket, in which case he would find his newfound unrestrained freedom completely unacceptable. Thank goodness for psychic aunts though, namely Aunts Pat and Jennie, who sent us a special swaddling blanket with velcro to keep it in place so he can't wiggle out of it. Now Mylo gets to sleep 3-4 hours in a row, so he's happy, and mom and dad get to sleep 3-4 hours in a row too, so we're happy. Win-win-win!

He told me to say he's got the moves like Jagger.

He's Here!

Weighing in at 8 lbs. 6 oz. and 20.5 inches long, Mylo finally arrived on September 16! 

From start to finish I was in labor for 22 hours. That included 3 hours of pushing when the time came, and finally ended in a c-section to get him out. He was either super stubborn or super comfortable. 

This is Bryan and me right before they started the c-section. I had about 6 blankets over me because I was so cold - I think my body just freaked out after 3 hours of pushing then being cut open. I remember a nurse asking if Bryan wanted to look over the curtain and watch. Why would anyone want to do that? Yes, I would like to watch my spouse get cut open, please. After that maybe I can eat some maggots or slam my hand in the car door, because all of those things sound equally appealing. 

Once they got him out, all I remember is waking up a couple of hours later. Bryan took one for the team and held him while I was sleeping.

Then I woke up!

And that's when I got to hold him. My doc warned me that my labor may end in a c-section early on in my pregnancy because Mylo was measuring big and my frame is pretty small. I tried to make it happen without being cut open, but I just couldn't do it. Oh well.

About half an hour after the above picture was taken I started experiencing the WORST pain I have EVER felt in my neck. I couldn't move, breathe, sit, lay, talk, or sleep without it hurting. They tried all sorts of pain killers and nothing was working. They finally had to call my doctor at home at 4am (sorry about that, doc...) to get an opinion on what to do. They think that I pulled a muscle in my neck from pushing so hard for 3 hours. I experienced labor, and then pain WORSE than labor, all in the same day, and what makes it even worse is that I couldn't even hold or feed Mylo at all during that time because it was so excruciating. I suppose I deserved a difficult labor since I had such an easy pregnancy.

Now it's over though, and Mylo is here and super cute and definitely getting held and fed! So far he's been a pretty good baby with minimal fussing. Knock on wood.

Sorry for the blur.

Somebody just woke up and was unhappy about being disturbed. 

After 5 nights in the hospital we finally got to go home, so I suited Mylo up in his very first outfit! 

Heh :) 

He doesn't like getting his diaper changed. I don't blame him, I bet it's really unpleasant. He has socks on his hands because baby nails are really sharp and he kept scratching his pretty lil face.

Upon arriving home, this is how we found him.

Surely that's not comfortable...

And now we're at home and settled in! The first night home was the hardest I think, because at the hospital I was basically waited on. I ordered whatever food I wanted and it was prepared and brought to me. A nurse brought me the medications I had to take on schedule, even during the wee hours of the morning. If I needed to take a shower the nursery would come pick up Mylo and watch him for me. There was a whole team of experts at my disposal for me to ask questions and keep an eye on both Mylo's and my health. Then we got home and I felt suddenly so isolated and inadequate. Since then it's been getting easier as we figure out Mylo and how he works.

I like this picture because of how tiny Mylo looks compared to Bryan. And that's it! Now it's time for Mylo to be fed again, so off I go! Then I'll put him down with a full belly and hopefully get to take a short nap while he is sleeping.

A Rant on Extreme Couponing

Have you heard the news? Kroger is going to stop doubling and tripling coupons, and as a sane, well-rounded, non-crazy coupon-clipper, I'm disappointed. They say that they made this choice because they want to focus that expense on lowering prices throughout the store, and if that's the case, then great. I, however, have a different theory. I think it's less because of that and more because of this:

Note the part at the end when her husband just wants to "clarify" that she took herself, their son, and her pregnant friend dumpster diving for coupons. I just feel like there's a line. And she crossed it. Big time. Dumpster diving is so far past the line that she can't even see it anymore. The line is gone to her. What line?


I had a feeling when I heard TLC was doing a show about "extreme couponing" that it may one day ruin it for the rest of us average coupon users. That day is upon us. I mean, who needs 27 packages of cream cheese? Or 1000 tubes of toothpaste? Who wants to have to store all of that? In short, I think these crazies (I said it!) took advantage of the system and now no one gets to benefit. At least at Kroger. As far as I know, Tom Thumb and Albertsons still double and triple. You can also come out pretty good at CVS and Walgreens with the right combination of sales and coupons (although they don't double or triple). Since Kroger is my grocer of choice, however, I am looking forward to these new lower prices they've promised me.

The Story of How I Still Have My Ring Finger

We made it past September 1st! That means Bryan's wicked new insurance will cover the pregnancy! Please pause for a moment while I do a happy dance.

...

Okay.

You're welcome for this nicer weather, by the by. I asked my doctor to please lower the temperature because I just can't handle any more of this crazy heat, and apparently she's God, because it happened. I've learned my lesson, though. Next time we're gonna plan this better and try real hard to avoid being in my third trimester in July and August in Texas.

38 weeks down!

2 to go.

My doctor is pretty sure I'll make it all the way to (and probably past) my due date, but still, just a couple more weeks of none of my clothes fitting and getting stuck on the couch like a turtle on it's shell.

I had to get my ring cut off last week. It was a sad moment, but I did get to see a fire truck up close, so that was neat. 

This is K. Hargrove with his tool *snicker*. You know, his ring cutter. I didn't think to ask what the "K" stood for. Probably Kevin. He looks like a Kevin. 

So it begins. 

 Action shot! I've never seen a ring cutter before. It's basically a mini-saw that he had to crank.

Close-up action shot!  There were 3 people pulling my finger in different directions.

Sad. But also happy, because I still have a finger. Also, Kevin was really nice and helpful.

And this is my battle wound:

It looks worse than it felt. My doctor said that my hands could swell even MORE (wtf?), so since I already couldn't get my ring off we had to cut it. It seems silly that I let it get this far, but I never ever take my ring off. Not to sleep, shower, wash my hands, never. I guess I'm just more committed to my marriage than you are. It wasn't until it got to be 6000 degrees this Summer in my third trimester that I realized that my ring was stuck. 

Since it was SO WEIRD not having a ring on, I made one.

Don't judge mah pudgy fangers. If YOU were pregnant, YOURS would be pudgy too. Don't worry though, this ring is elastic and comes off very easily.

So, word to the wise my pregnant friends, get your ring off before your fingers swell in your third tri! Otherwise you have to get it cut, which is sad. Also, you have to pay to get it re-soldered. Boo.

In other pregnant news, I finally packed my hospital bag. I guess that means I'm ready. Oh, and I bought my first tube of nipple cream, so I guess that means I'm a grown woman.